


What Do I Say?

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Drama/Romance, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 06:08:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/794740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A troubled night's sleep leads to a confession of love. (Jim's POV)</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Do I Say?

J/B, PG. Yes, I actually wrote something that was PG. Comments are forever welcomed. 

Disclaimer: I do not own or make any claim on the Sentinel or it's characters. They are the property of Pet Fly Prod. 

## What Do I Say?

by Janette Mallory  


Street noise wakes me from my sleep. I sit up and try to rub the sleepiness from my eyes. I slip out of bed and grab my robe off of the top of the hamper. I put it on as I step down the stairs. 

I walk over to the refrigerator. I open it and stare at it blankly for several minutes before I realize that what I want, won't be found here. My head turns to his room. 

Blair. How could I have let him get so close. Sure he's persistent, but so was Caroline. Look how that turned out. But Blair, I have never felt this way about anyone in my entire life the way I do about him. It's strange. If someone had asked me ten years ago where I'd be now, I would never have imagined this. Sentinel abilities. Ha. I think it's God's idea of a cruel joke. And if I ever meet up with Cupid, I'll break his bow and send him back up Mount Olympus the hard way. How dare he make me fall for this kid. 

It's not because he's a man. Well, okay, I admit it. That part of it does kind of bother me. It's not that I've never been attracted to another man, it's just that I've never actually considered acting on those feelings. But with Blair it just feels right. Simply said, he completes me. With out him I'm lost. 

I quietly walk over to the couch, not wanting to wake Blair. In the darkness, I accidentally bang my shin on the coffee table. A vase tips over with a loud clang. Damn. I hope it didn't wake him. 

My eyes drift towards his room, as I sit down onto the couch. I know I have to either tell him how I feel or move on. I can't keep going on like this. He's going to leave me, if not now than later, if I don't do something. We cannot keep going on like this. 

I here sheets rustling and feet hitting the ground. Shuffling, then the sound of a doorknob turning. Blair pears out of his room, looking disheveled. His T-shirt and boxers are wrinkled and his hair is wild. 

"Jim? Is that you?" 

"Yeah Blair. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." 

"That's all right. I couldn't really sleep either." Blair strides over to the couch and sits next to me. "What's bothering you big guy." 

"Nothing Chief." 

I look away unable to let him see the pain in my eyes. I feel the warm touch of his hand on my face, turning my head to face his. 

"Jim, look at me." 

God I can't stand it. "Sandburg." I stand and walk away. Away from him. I find myself staring out the window into the darkness and emptiness of the night. Rather like how I feel right now. For some reason this strikes me as funny and I begin to laugh. It is pretty absurd that this kid, no, this man could turn my whole life and my heart upside down. 

"What's so funny?" He steps beside me and looks into my face. "Jim, are you crying?" 

I wipe away the tears that are running down my face, "Yeah, I guess am." 

Blair steps in front of me, "Please, tell me what's wrong Jim. I hate to see you hurt like this. I want to help, but I can't unless you let me in." 

I cradle his head in my hands and gaze into his eyes, "That's just it Blair. Your already in. Always were. Your like a whirlwind. There was no stopping it." 

"Jim? What's going on?" 

What do I say? Tell me Blair, your always there to help me with these things, what am I supposed to say? 

"Blair, you are my guide, my partner, and my friend. But you are also so much more. Your a part of me. With out you I can't live." 

"Jim, what are you saying?" 

"I love you Blair. I want to be with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. In short I want to marry you." 

Blair backs away out of my grip, "What?" 

"I'm sorry Blair. Not for telling you, but for waiting so long. If you want to leave, I'll understand. I just hope that you'll be able to forgive me." 

"Yes." 

"What?" 

"Yes. I mean no, I won't marry you. I'm not ready for that. But yes, I do love you." 

I grab his hand, "Blair, you mean this? Because I'm serious." 

"So am I. I never thought I'd be saying this, but Jim I love you. I never expected to feel this way, but I do and I wouldn't change it for the world." 

"Thank you Blair." 

"For what? Loving you?" 

"Yes." 

I enclose my arms around him and bring him close to my body. I don't kiss him. I won't push it. This is all I ever wanted. To hold him. To love him. And to know that he loves me. 

He looks up at me, "What do we do now?" 

"Sleep." I half carry him to the couch and lay down with him. I hold him tight as he gets into a comfortable position above me. His hair brushes against my face and I relish it. He lays his head onto my chest and I run a hand through his hair, while my other arm clings to him firmly. 

"Goodnight Jim." 

"Goodnight Blair."   
  


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